Queria o pequeno-almoço na cama.  Sumo de laranja, café, croissant com queijo e fiambre. Fruta: manga; doce e sumarenta. E depois queria ficar deitada na cama. Abraçada a ti. A minha cabeça no teu peito, o teu braço a segurar-me contra ti, e eu ali, naquele espaço, que parece ter sido criado só para mim. Eu ali, naquele que é o único lugar onde eu queria estar naquele exacto momento.

E eu ali, a sentir o calor do teu corpo, o cheiro da tua pele.  E nós ali, a conversar.

Bom fim-de-semana!

Já não quero o teu colo. Prefiro mergulhar bem alto do penhasco e afundar-me na corrente fria. Prefiro sentir o estilhaçar dos ossos mas sentir-me viva. Prefiro que o mar gélido engula os meus pecados. Prefiro que as ondas me calem o sufoco no peito. Que a água gélida me lave a alma. Que este soçobrar seja sob a força de um oceano. Prefiro. Porque no final só podes contar contigo. Só tu e mais ninguém. E então corres, ganhas balanço e saltas. A leap of faith.

Sabia-te o nome antes de tu teres chegado à minha vida.  Querias tudo e eu dei-te o que pude, enquanto pude. E foi tão pouco! Queria ter-te dado tudo, tudo o que não tinha para dar e que te devia ter dado. E agora fica o silêncio.  E é ensurdecedor. O vazio. E é avassalador.

For even if I'm far away
I hold you in my heart
I sing a secret song to you
Each night we are apart

He told me I am like a free bird.  And that he is a tree. That birds fly and he is scared that I, being a free bird as I am, will fly away and not come back.

I listened and told him that I may be a free bird, that birds love to fly, and that I, as a free bird may indeed fly away. That I may fly away and never come back, cause that's what birds do. But I may also take a short fligth and come back to rest on the same tree. I told him that even if I fly away somewhere far and never come back, as a bird that loved that tree, I would never forget it.

As a bird that loved that tree, that amazing strong tree with deep roots that withold so many storms, strong branches that hold me from any wind and beautiful amazing leaves that shelter and keep me protected, I would never forget that tree. Which is sad though beautiful. What I never told him is that he, as a tree, will hold and give shelter to so many other birds. And yes, I know he would argue and say no, no no. And I shouldn't say many birds. But that tree will hold another bird. That's for sure. And yes, I will never forget that tree.

A stream. Flowing on its own way. I saw it. I was thirsty and immediately drank from it. The water is sweet. I rested under a tree near the stream. I observed around. Many people were drinking from the stream also. Then I realized this stream must have come flowing from something big. And I wanted to taste from that source. So, I kept walking along the shore of the stream, following its line. The journey was filled with ease and difficulty, joy and sorrow, happiness and sadness. Then I could hear it, the sound of waves, winds, sounds of water splashing. After a while I could see it, not what I was expecting. It was not a calm river, it was a roaring ocean. With huge waves. I could see its might and beauty. It was amazing and fierce. It was so beautiful and yet the vastness of the ocean would raise fear in any man. But I approached. With fear and excitement. And I felt the little waves hitting my feet. It was cold, and warm at the same time. Then I drank from it. To my amaze, the water tasted even sweeter. Then I thought, if only I didn’t have the courage to come near, I would have never tested it. And it felt so good. I stayed there for a while. And then I looked deep into the ocean. There I could see, a wonderful garden, in the middle of the ocean. Green, with fruits and flowers. It was like a small piece of heaven put there, only for someone special. But then I realized, the ocean is protecting the garden, protecting from any harm, any scavangers. Preventing them to reach the garden, preventing them to taste its fruits, smell its flowers. But I could not resist. I wanted to go into the garden. I wanted to taste its fruits. I wanted to smell the fragrance of the flowers. I wanted to lay down on its soft grass. So I dived, deep into the ocean, with all my confidence. Then I felt its might. The waves were tossing me around. But every time I was losing my balance, I found even a better grip. Every time I was being dragged by the waves, I found more strength to fight it. And then I came so close that I could smell the fragrance of the flowers, it was so sweet, so addiciting. But I realized. I am so close, yet so far away. I can see the garden so clearly, yet it is out of my reach. I can see the soft grass, but can’t touch it. I can see the fruits, but can’t taste it. And I keep looking at the garden. It is so beautiful. I looked back at the ocean. It is still full of might. Fierce, but dazzling. And I looked back at the garden again. It is beautiful, amazing, sweet, lovely and full of innocence.

Masum

Há dias, a Daniela, disse-me assim: olha, para ti. E foi. Como são tantas vezes as palavras dela. É. Tanto.

«Há quem me abraça sempre a alma e se deixa ficar. E o amor existe. Há quem me dá sempre a mão e se faz sempre perto. E o amor existe. Há quem me sorri sempre com o coração. E o amor existe. Há quem me olha sempre tão de verdade, como quem olha por dentro. E o amor existe. Há quem me beija sempre com a ternura mais mágica. E o amor existe. Há quem me abriga sempre em colo seguro. E o amor existe. Há quem me faz sempre rir de mais uma forma que eu ainda não conhecia. E o amor existe. Há quem me pede sempre para eu ficar mais um bocadinho e mais uma e outra vez. E o amor existe. Há quem me sente sempre e me vê da forma mais bonita: de verdade. E o amor existe. Há quem me ama sempre e se faz sempre morada. E o amor existe. Há quem me faz ser sempre mais lugar de amor. Mais lugar de tudo. De tudo o que importa. E o amor existe. 

O amor existe. Acontece-nos todos os dias. Assim. Nas nossas pessoas. Nos gestos que mudam tudo. Por aí. Quase despercebido… Mas tão perto. Tão à vista.

O amor existe. Acontece-nos todos os dias. E salva-nos de todos os dias.»